It's 3:30 am. I got out of work at my part time job about 20 minutes ago. It was a hellish night, based alone on the fact that the AC in the store was not working so it was quite hot in there. Ordinarily I'd be going home to Jon, who either would have crashed hours ago or would have waited up and then argued with me about being at work so late. He'd ask me why I still worked that job. Shake his head at me. He would have messaged me throughout the night. Photos of the cat. Some little project he took on. He was really good company, even when we fought. We had the kind of relationship where we just enjoyed being together. No words needed. I miss him terribly right now. I miss his green eyes and the feel of his freshly shaved head. I miss his smell. The way he just radiated warmth - no need for blankets. I miss his movements - there was a deliberateness about them. I miss the dozens of tiny kisses he'd give me at a time. I just miss him. Even the bad stuff. I miss the bad stuff. At least he was here. I guess maybe that's pretty selfish. It's 3 am and I must be lonely... #asongforjon #mentalhealth #depression #suicideprevention #love #relationships #grief #grieving #loss #survivor #musicproject #playlist #spotify #matchboxtwenty #3am

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